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so let me give you the simplest explanation of a boundary you get into a conflict with your partner and they call you stupid not a great choice in my opinion and you have a boundary around name calling as you should so in that moment you calmly say hey time out this discussion is over I’m going to step away because I have a boundary around people disrespecting me so I’m going to leave for an hour and we can continue this later if you’re open to that and you don’t call me names see boundaries aren’t about me controlling you in fact my boundary has nothing to do with you it’s about me honoring me and what I know I deserve because I deserve kindness and respect even during a conflict as do you boundaries aren’t about me punishing or controlling you you can continue to say whatever you want all I’m doing is controlling what I can control which is my physical presence or the level of access I give to you at this moment now if they don’t let you leave that’s called abuse there’s laws against that

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