I'm a 19 year old male, semi-build , 6-feet and had been liking this girl since I was in my 11th year of schooling.
This goes back to the starting of the covid era,I had recently moved on from a "situationship" and during that phase didn't wanna go see someone else. But well life can be surprising sometimes. Destiny having other plans made me see another girl right after a month I ended things from my situationship. The first time I ever saw her was in my physics class and unfortunately during that time was the era of online classes. Initially I didn't wanna make a move during that time cuz I didn't wanna face another situationship and end up being disappointed but with her it seemed different. I then started talking to her from fall 2020, as we talked to each other I found out we had known each other for a pretty long time but this was the first time we talked properly with each other.
Skipping to December 2020, I couldn't hold it and from my perspective made the biggest dick move ever. I ended up confessing to her via that I liked her without even meeting her once and downright got rejected. However, she later added that she was always down to hangout with me. Disappointed, I kept all that stuff at a halt afterwards. From Jan 2021 to April 2021 was a pretty dry period of texting and after that. Things took somewhat of a turn after that, in July 2021 she started texting me again and we were back to square one. We started talking almost frequently and it gave me the satisfaction that this time it actually might happen. I had gone through a pretty rough period dealing with a lot of extenuating circumstances from April to May and she was the first person I ended up speaking about it(excluding the people who are really close to me).
The way she spoke with me and the way she treated me after I opened upto her was really different and she was way more supportive than the people whom I believed would have my back. Flipping to December 2021, I asked her out and this time she said YES. I was soo happy that time And I legit jumped with joy. Well that happiness didn't go for that long, unfortunately she had to dip cuz she had to travel to her uncles place since it was his 50th birthday(didn't believe her initially but then I ended up seeing her stories)
At the start of 2022, we did spoke a lot but then it wasn't with the same intensity it was from before. In May, 2022 I ended up forcing myself to "move on" and after a while I stopped texting her. I couldn't even muster up the courage of speaking to her on graduation day and that was the last time I ended up seeing her.
Though I push myself not to text her again but somewhere in my mind I still believe something might happen between us and cuz of that I'm not able to move on. None of the girls in my uni have till date made me develope a strong feeling towards them the way I had did for her and though I try to tell myself it ain't gonna happen but my heart aches everytime I try to forget about her. And sometimes I see posts on my insta feed like "she's the one bro" and though I'm a realist some part of my heart tries to say to myself "hopefully ".
I have tried almost everything(deleting her number, stopped texting her, unfollowed her on insta and even ended up deleting all my chats with her)
If any of you guys know what else I should try to that I can forget this feeling once and for all and move on please tell me. Any idea would be greatly appreciated.