relationships are hard.



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This was a difficult one to make. Relationships are hard and many decisions have to be made to either stay together or part ways.

Transcript

so I just broke up with my girlfriend and I’m not going to not asking for pity or support or anything I’m fine but I wanted to talk about this while I was still fresh because I think that’s when the best time to talk about things is when it’s fresh relationships are hard you know people uh people break up and stay together for all kinds of different reasons and in my particular case I felt it was time to break up and the good thing is we’re on good terms you know we still love each other but you know one of us is not as there as much as they used to be um I’m going to try and spare the details but it just wasn’t the same you know and uh it wasn’t the same in a way that you couldn’t fix it this wasn’t a you know we can sit and talk about this and it’ll heal it was a this can’t go on any longer because we’re going to hate each other type of deal and uh you know we both have to accept that we both have to accept this fact for reasons uh reasons that life won’t tell you but I wanted to take this opportunity to talk about relationships relationships are hard people you need to work at them you need to constantly work and build them some that didn’t happen with mine and I know that now and I’ve learned from this issue but uh you also have to not be afraid to end relationships that aren’t working out when there really isn’t much that can be done about them when there really isn’t much that can be done about it um and that is what I believe my case was and uh I don’t know if I already said this but I’m going to call my my girlfriend velvet so that we can refer refer to her and velvet if you’re seeing this I’m sorry if you’ve had to this somehow managed to get to your recommended page I’m sorry if you have to hear about this secondhand but I want to try and have as minimal amount of cut of cuts as possible I want to keep this as raw and original as possible I think that in general that’s a goal with this channel but in this specific episode I want it to be real I want it to be so real that you can feel the I guess the pain because pain is good people don’t realize it but you need pain in your life you need pain to learn and grow from you need pain so that certain things won’t hurt later in life or it’s just useful for many reasons and it’s hard for me to cast my thoughts right now honestly I’m surprised I’m not tearing up yeah if you’re in a relationship and you feel that uh yeah if you feel that you’re unhappy or if you feel that something’s wrong you need to tell your partner and if it’s something that if it’s something that’s so detrimentally wrong that you can’t even really tell your partner something that you really can’t tell them because it’s going to hurt their feelings Beyond any other recognition that’s one of the times when you might have to lie a little bit and luckily that’s not what happened in my case I didn’t have to lie about what happened or why we broke up which which I think is why we’re still amicable and still able to talk to each other is that a witches hut that is a witches hut let’s go over there I’ve been in a few relationships right this was the only one that was real and um I’ve learned for all from all of them and what I’ve learned from the other two is that you shouldn’t really let your guard down too quickly because people don’t show who they are until a year after the relationship really is going on because it really takes that level of time and uh effort to find out these things right you can’t just learn who a person is in a day or a month or even three months because people when the first three months of a relationship usually are still in What’s called the honeymoon phase and that the so-called honeymoon phase isn’t um it’s not a real thing it’s not a phase that really you can tell it’s it’s when people put up their best show like when girls still wear makeup to bed type of thing when guys you know are always clean in their houses before you know they start farting all over the place and leaving the dirty all over the floor know so it takes that first 3mon period and then there’s another three months right and those other three months are where um do I want this cauldron can I even break this cauldron with I can okay and then the next three months are a phase of oh this person kind of annoys me this person is like um this person is giving me multiple XS as certain girls say and that’s fine too you have to go through that phase to see like if the things that you once thought were cute about this person were now just going to annoy the out of you for the rest of your life if you if you’re that sort of partner Seeker you’re looking for a life partner and then you go into the next three months which um or when you start to realize like okay I can handle this or this is worth staying with this person for or you know this is worth X Y and Z and I really I still really love this person for this reason and you go and the list goes on right and uh you know that’s nine months that’s nine months at least and of course it’s not the same for everybody it can be 9 months it could be 2 years it could be hell it could be less the reality is it’s going to take time to find out what you need about a person before you can make the decision to either stay with them and see if they’re the person for you I’m going to die to a spider now because I’m okay so when you reach that final point of like the final decision that you’re going to make of staying with this person or continuing to be with this person that’s when the relationship really starts that’s when you really start to have the difficult conversations it’s when you start to have the the hard stuff go on and uh that’s the part where Love Hurts you know in my specific case it had been hurting for a while because for lack of a better way oh God I’m going to die I’m so boned I’m so boned I’m so boned I’m so boned I’m so boned um oh no I’m boned I’m I’m I’m so wait oh you’re kidding oh you’re kidding no no no no no no no no no no okay well I guess I’m dead it had reached a point in my relationship right where one of us was hurting the other and it was hurting in a way that you can’t really do anything about it as the part part that’s hurting the other party the only thing you can do is let them down slowly or let them down easily rather not slowly and it’s hard to be that person it’s hard to be the person who’s going to be the bad guy in the end or not necessarily the bad guy just you know the one to end it all people don’t really ever tell you about that people people always talk about it’s hard to get broken up with and you’ll heal and it’ll be okay but no one tells you what it’s like to be on the other side of that coin and the other side of that coin is just as bad if not worse for people that really care about their partners and that was the truth for me I still love velvet she’s uh she’s a great person amazing woman but it wasn’t going to work out between us and I could see it and uh at the time or right now she can’t see that she doesn’t understand it but uh I have faith that you will I hope that you will and I wish her the best of luck and I wish her I just wish her happiness and that’s how you should be right if you break up with someone right unless they were a total piece of garbage to you unless they like abused you emotionally or something like that if you’re going to let them down try to be kind try to be nice to them cuz at the end of the day this was a person that you spent a good significant part of your time with for a certain amount of years or months or whatever and this person may have may or may not have loved you you know if you’re going to rip their heart out do it kindly as kind as you can be about something like that and if you’re on the other side of that coin you know if you’re the one being broken up with as I have been a couple of times just know that there’s going to be something else there’s going to be someone else who can either fix your heart or break it all over again but I think that’s the beauty of love and relationships they’re unpredictable and they can be fun and painful and good and bad in so many ways and velvet if you did happen to find this video and you’re still watching wherever you are at whatever point in your life I uh I hope you’re doing okay and uh I hope you’re happy anyway guys I’m GNA try and find my items but I won’t spare you with the boredom so uh good night and good luck